The "REVELATIONSHIP"

It's no secret that clothing plays an important role in an individual’s life. Apart from dressing for modesty and other general reasons, clothing to a certain extent defines who you are, your feelings and just maybe what you're all about as an extension of your personality. We all comprise of a wardrobe, and this time not in the literal sense of the word but in a fashion sense - A collection of clothes you've accumulated over the months or years. This wardrobe is what you are in your daily living. We chuck out the old pieces to introduce a fresh new range (well, so I’d like to believe we all do to avoid unnecessary clutter), while keeping those special items we still find hard to get rid of (the one or two that aren’t so dodgy).

Now here's where I’m at... The 'revelationship'! Yep, the act of realizing that your partner seriously has none when it comes to style! None buddy. None!

We will not sit here and think that it's mainly women who can't stand their partners' lack of effort and style because we've lived and seen that many men nowadays keep themselves on the forefront of things when it comes to clothing! There's a dress or top of yours he would so gladly free you from being granted the opportunity to, just as much as you pray for that light of style to grace his life every morning before he faces the world.

Looking back at my experiences, I’ve always had to lend a helping hand to many of my partners. If he wasn't young and caught up in the Hip Hop scene trying to look like that horrid rapper in oversize garments that went south! Then it was the grown, mature guy who still does the early 80's look leaving me embarrassed for days as he neatly tucks in his "vintage" plaid box shirt in those 'jean-like-things' my old man use to wear! As hard as it may be, light has to be shed on some people out there to help them catch up with the moving world. So then the question becomes...How do I help introduce life and style into my not so fashionable partners/friends wardrobe?

Go through his/her closet with them and make four piles. In the first pile, put everything that you both want to keep, this will be the anchor/ timeless pieces. This pile can end up very small - don't worry about that. The second pile is for clothes that can be given away or donate to charity. The third pile is for clothes that are so ruined that they cannot be worn. The last pile should have clothes that they don’t won't wear, but like something about it- maybe it's the colour, fabric or even the embellishment on it. Set these aside for later. When clearing out the wardrobe together, don't keep things just because family and friends bought them and it would be injustice chucking them out. Let them in on the change before they decide to buy you something similar on your birthday and say, 'you liked it before so i bought you another one.'

• Make a list of the clothes needed. If you they had twelve pairs of pants and threw out four pairs, you don't need to buy any more pants. Make sure the colors are flexible even for serious occasions like work.


• Check on fashion magazines, or catalogs. Focus your attention solely on the style that is presented and be mindful of thoughts that stray towards the appearance of the body. Redirect those thoughts back to the task at hand! Is there a look that jumps out at them? Make notes of their favorites by naming the characteristics of the style that they liked and choose a favorite look.


• Be realistic. Obviously, if you choose to dress like Chuck Bass from Gossip girls, you'll probably want to change the look so it's cheaper and more appropriate for your body and lifestyle. Although he can easily pull off the preppy look with short shorts, you might not want to and probably can't wear that to work or town. Modify it until your friend/partner loves it - and can wear it. Just remember: this is THEIR style, not Chucks!


• Go out and hit the mall (if your bank account will allow it!)- Or even better, the outlets. They have reduced prices on all their clothes. Be a bargain shoppers - if you see a shirt that's "to die for" in one store but it's a little on the expensive side, shop around for another one that's very similar, but with a price tag that's a little easier on the pocket.


• Be sure to buy the basic things according to the weather. For example, don't buy shorts in winter, because you won't be able to wear them until summer!


• Look for unique items. Let them ask themselves, "What is something I like that no one else wears?" keeping in mind that one should never wear any garment that doesn't completely flatter body type, no matter how fashionable it may be. Try out some other trends instead, and accept that not every style was made for every person.


• When you have enough money to buy a few outfits, raid the town or mall and look though charity shops, vintage shops, shops you've never seen before and get whatever works. Nothing has to match! Then put all the outfits together and/or customize them.


• Get 2-6 pairs of shoes. Some people overbuy shoes, so remember to only get a reasonable amount that suits you.


• When you're satisfied, go home and try to make outfits out of the new clothes. Mix and match - even if you didn't think your new tank would look good with your capris, try it out. Maybe all you need is that belt you haven't worn since last summer to pull the whole outfit together.


• Mix different styles. You'd be surprised at what styles actually do mix.


• Be bold with the colors that you like to wear, but stick to what suits you. Try a boldly-colored shirt with more neutral skirt or pants and shoes or neutral outfit and colored accessories.


• Take the fourth pile (of clothes not worn regularly) and try creating new garments.


• Enhance the total look with accessories. You could get that funky necklace shes been thinking of buying, but didn't have the courage. Just make sure it isn't offensive. Watches, a hat to match an outfit, bold earrings or even that simple scarf and arm band.

Throw in a few compliments at their efforts to help give them a confident boost and most important of all, let them be themselves. Creating a personal style is really just wearing what you want. Think more positively and be more constructive and expressive with your ideas and abilities.